we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I want her autograph on my taint
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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