i barfeds in our rink
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
Every concussion has its silver lining
If you're not on crutches for breakfast, I'll feel like I've failed you.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
"I vaguely remember the Health and Safety Inspector walking into my room this morning while I was passed out naked. That's one way to get it over with quickly."
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
