: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
he probably thinks i inited him over to have sex but really i just want to show him 90's music videos
Enjoy the penises
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
In other news, I’ve officially fucked a grandpa.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize