i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
