Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
