She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
Everclear isn't food dammit
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
Randomize
