yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Randomize
