it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i'm so high that for the last 10 minutes i pretened my sock was a mouse, and played with it like it was legit.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize
