Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Green mimosas i think yes
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
