We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
