Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
The dog just did a longer kegstand than anyone at the party
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog.
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Randomize
