Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
So the girl I met at the bar last night came home with me. Played with my puppy. And left.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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