The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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