Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the white crusty stuff on my boxers was frosting not cum. She seemed MORE grossed out then
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
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