I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
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Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Everything in my purse is 100% saturated in red wine, which made it challenging to cover up my booze breath with franzia soaked gum
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
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Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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