PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Randomize
