I would have at least made out with you if you were showered.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
You told the entire McDonalds staff that I was a whore and that you didn't want your french fries cooked.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
We were just sitting together and this guy walks up to us and says, "you ladies are drinking too slow", puts a 5 dollar bill on the table and just leaves the bar. Helloooo Taco Bell
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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