she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
Remember that one time i smeared period blood on your face?
I hate you
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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