I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
Randomize
