the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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