I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize