remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
Three words: puerto rican gang bang
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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