Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
her vagine was all disorganized.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Sorry about peeing on your phone last night
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
Randomize
