I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
Randomize
