apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize