There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
My dog fell asleep in his puke last night. He's only 5 weeks old and has more in common with my friends than I do.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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