i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?
um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
The amount of times I have been emergency drunk in the past 72 hours is staggering
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
why is half of my head shaved?
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