I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Accidentally texted co-worker instead of bf “I’m wfh tomrw. Nooner? 💦”
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
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