I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
I just put bacon on a thin mint and enjoyed the shit out of it. I better not be fucking pregnant.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
