you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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