If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Randomize
