ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
Randomize
