do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
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Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
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I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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