I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Just got hit on by a 50 year old Englishman who is now swapping drunken racing stories with my mom. Live Mariachi band in the background. How's that for a wake?
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
