your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
how drunk was i? i pretended i was getting a blowjob from a fuckin dolphin in front of my dad. thats how drunk i was.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
