i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
I'm hungover from the 8pm vodka and still drunk from the 5am beer.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
