quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Randomize
