do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
My balls are so social today.
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
If you do that, i will make all sorts of uncomfortable comments about my nipples being soft
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize
