porn star boner night. come get it.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I have to talk to myself and be all "you are NOT horny tonight"
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
