rhymes with "ouble enetration"
the guy in front of me just bought a pound of bacon, a bouquet, and a case of budlight, i want to see THAT makeup sex
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Do you think I can wear the dress I went to jail in with the shoes I went to prom in to the wedding tonight?
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Randomize
