I wish I could punch you in the face.
At least I can take solace in the fact that with 8 billion some odd people in the world, at least one of them is shitting in their own car right now.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
