Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
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