Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
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