so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
went to the bathroom to piss, saw puke in the toilet thought wtf i dont remember puking, then turned around to find a chick i've never seen before passed out in my shower.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
