i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I couldn't figure out her damn button fly jeans... IM NOT A FUCKING ENGINEER
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
All I want is dick and wine.
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