U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
I almost just texted "I'm lonely" to my gynecologist.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Randomize
