so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Matt. This is the manager of qdoba. Pick up the phone. Your friend needs you.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
