So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
I am available for nakedness
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