I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize