I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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