My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Will exercising make me less horny?
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize