I think I died a long time ago.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
